Holding on to each other

When Abigail and her younger sister Isabella look back on the events of the past few years, they could understandably dwell on what they didn’t have. Support. Stability. A choice.

Instead, the sisters are focused on how they became closer.

“We had each other. That’s what got us through,” says Abigail.

Growing up in a household where volatility was the norm, Abigail and Isabella had their lives upended when their parents separated, resulting in them moving to a different state with their mother.

Without any established family or friends to rely upon in new surroundings, the upheaval exacerbated existing anxiety for Isabella, who struggled to attend school or leave the house without becoming ill.

Complicating matters was the instability in their living situation.

“We were moving from house to house a lot. I think we lived in four houses in five years,” says Isabella.

As a consequence of so much uncertainty, compounded by their mother being unable to provide adequate care due to mental health challenges and dependence on prescription medication, the sisters were left with no choice but to spend a period of time living out of a car.

“It was dehumanising – having to use public bathrooms, because you don’t have your own. [We didn’t] have a kitchen, so we had to be strategic with what we ate and what food we bought.”

The experience of having no fixed address saw the sisters move back to live with their father in the hope of stability.

Unfortunately, what they returned to was an overcrowded apartment that offered no respite from the trauma they had endured.

“We had to share a room which was awful…we’re young adults who need privacy and space – it was very confining.”

Remaining in overcrowded conditions for several months before the untenability saw the sisters accepted for temporary accommodation, their housing application was subsequently approved in a fortuitous moment that put them in contact with Vinnies.

Gaining assistance from Christine, a Vinnies member, to furnish their empty unit into a home, the support offered by local conference members also took into consideration personal needs such as dietary requirements.

“At the time [I] was going through a lot of digestive problems. They put together a gluten-free hamper which was so considerate,” says Abigail.

This approach to meeting people’s individual needs is what defines the support provided by Vinnies, according to Christine.

“We help people set up a new beginning and provide them with hope,” says Christine.

“That’s how I see our role – providing people with hope and being there for them in their darkest times and helping them come out of that place.”

Abigail and Isabella are just two of the thousands of people the St Vincent de Paul Society Victoria supports when times get tough each year.

Our members and services are able to respond with a range of material, financial and emotional assistance, but this support relies upon people giving generously to the Vinnies Winter Appeal.

It is through funds raised from initiatives like the Winter Appeal that the Society has been able to provide the sisters with food, toiletries, vouchers to purchase household items as well as larger items including a fridge, beds and a washing machine.

This support has been transformative in laying a foundation for the sisters to take control of the next chapter of their lives after years of not having a choice in their circumstances.

“They’ve got some goals and that’s something they weren’t able to have before. How do you have any goals when you’ve got nowhere to call home?” says Christine.

As Abigail and Isabella look to make a home with each other where stability is the new norm, they are thankful for the role Vinnies has played in helping to break the cycle of hardship.

“We were treated with kindness and respect,” says Abigail.

“Everything that we’ve been through has brought us closer too, because we’ve had to hold onto each other to get through,” says Isabella.

Your support of the Vinnies Winter Appeal will ensure people like Abigail and Isabella have somewhere to turn to in times of need.